Friday, May 20, 2011

Highlight Vids

Hi again, world. In case you've missed us, here are a couple of videos of Junk this year. The first video listed is from our winter and spring seasons. The second is from this past fall before the A/B split. Enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZuenGBSx_8

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wYOn0lpSR80&feature=related

-Hupps

Monday, March 7, 2011

Mardi Gras 2011, or, Trouble Redux

Junk headed to Midway airport for their first flight without Southwest in ages. Underwhelmed by the half-can-of-beverage and pitiful-packet-of-peanuts that the unnamed airline provided, the troops descended upon Baton Rouge, LA for a long weekend of glorious rain and outdoor Ultimate. Everyone arrived more or less on time and were ready to test our mettle outside of Krown Kastle.

Day 1
Game 1
After taking an early lead against Houston, per Coach Zubair's orders of up-by-four-or-bust, play was suspended on account of lightning. After several hours of sitting in cars or watching other teams play monstrous games of flutterguts, play resumed. Junk continued to rack up the points amidst the torrents of rain and the shrill whining of the tornado warning siren. 13-5, Junk. Undefeated for the 2011 season. The day then got called because of rain or something, and then the sun came out shortly after. Balls.

Day 2
Game 2
Ex-captain Ryborg Bartox takes the camera and proceeds to shit the dog. Game 1 vs. Missouri State, he missed my sick endzone D, sang to himself while staring at the ground, and missed Bank's almost-throw-a-Callahan. Overall, Ryborg's frisbitch interpretation of the Blair Witch Project was underwhelming. Apart from saying "Drrrl" a lot and calling Dean "Mean Mister Dean," not a whole lot was captured on film. I didn't think this was possible, but Binder, can you hold the camera again?
Missouri State had some dece players, but their dubious response to every pick call ("were you within 10 feet?" Fuck you, Mo State, I know what a pick is) was irritating at best. They did have a pretty sweet endzone call though: "V-stack Frankenberry." Note to handlers, incorporate that into our repertoire. 13-10, Mo State.

Game 3
After some waiting and much fumbling about on the tournament director's part, Junk found themselves faced with an opponent once more. They discovered that ultimate players from Arkansas are frighteningly similar to the contraceptive device used to wash out a human vagina. Hirsch calls a foul and the Arkansas sideline erupts with profanity. Coach Zubair clarifies what the actual rules are and the Arkansas players on the field tell the sidelines not to get involved. 9-8, Junk. No comment.

Then a bye round in which Hupps films Supersnatch for 5 minutes with no goals scored. The Men's Competitive Tanning Team enjoys jerky bits in the wind and then heads for field 6 and their final game.

Game 4
North Texas had a lot of tall athletic bros that like to throw up some swilly hucks. Someone said they went to nationals recently. Junk breaks them repeatedly. The rookie line (plus Scott and Hirsch) get a break for the win. 13-4, Junk.

Final thoughts: Jake loves watching himself on the sidelines with his hands in his pants at all times, Men's Competitive Tanning Team will have a crispy spring break, and Zubair doesn't know the difference between blind and deaf (re: a paper for an ASL class, "wait, why isn't it in Braille?"). Is Junk going to Nationals or just Taco Bell? Stay tuned.

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Looky What Baby Found on the Innernet

Have you ever had your peeny "slickled"? Would you like to? Click this, close your eyes, and get a rough approximation of how I feel about winter practices.

The only thing that keeps me going is the knowledge that by the end of the quarter, I'll look like this -->

What keeps you excited about Ultimate?